Message of Love

The messengers are often unexpected.

Ever have one of those mornings where freedom of speech, child molestation, singing in a rock band, murder and the power of intention come up? Around a decision you have to make for your CHILD?

Ahhh, the easy-going beauty of a Wednesday morning.

Here is the story.

Our son Leo is in an Aerosmith school of rock band. Last night he was assigned to play guitar on Janie’s Got A Gun. My husband did not respond positively to this news.

Although a HUGE Aerosmith fan, he didn’t think the lyrical content about a girl being molested and then murdering her father to make it stop, was appropriate for our 9 year old much less the school of rock in general to be putting out there.

This has never been my favorite Aerosmith song. The unrelenting beat and ominous tone always made me feel creepy and uncomfortable, so I’d turn it off. Now I know why.

To say he felt passionately and vehemently against Leo playing on this song would be an understatement. He was appalled that the school would choose this song with the huge repertoire of Aerosmith songs available.

He called the school owner and shared his point of view, encouraged them to reconsider.

A wild herd of thoughts stampeded through my brain.

In no particular order they went like this: Wow, he is REALLY upset about this. Yikes, I wonder how his cautioning/ pleading/ reprimanding “talk” is going to impact Leo and his new teacher, band director and friends. Great, that is the only song he worked on at his lesson this week. Hmm, is Joe’s reaction about this or the other five hundred things he is really stressed out about? Ugghh, so now after they’ve done a favor by switching his band group because of OUR scheduling issue, we are being the trouble-makers. Grrr, I don’t feel like putting anything else on my plate right now!

None of my thoughts had anything to do with the song.

Because at that particular moment, all I could process was the intensity of the information being delivered and its possible consequences. The content and my feeling about it would come later.

There was no room in which to have a discussion because the ferocity of Joe’s point of view was wolverine-like. It was astronomically bigger than a song. It was as if he was defending the very essence and innocence of childhood.

He was. And how can you, why would you ever want to argue against THAT?

Sometimes, it’s best to walk away for a while.

So, I read another chapter of Wind In The Willows, in which Toad crashes another motorcar and escapes from prison as a washerwoman. And I went to bed.

We raced through a morning of the usual insanity– breakfast, reading and written response, time stables, instrument practice (minus the obvious), teeth brushing, dog-feeding, dressing and out the door.

With everyone gone, I sat down stared out the window.

A hawk soared through the wide blue sky and then the thick bramble of branches that looked, to my eye, to be unnavigatable. And then back into the clear.

I love messages delivered in metaphor at the exact right time.

So, we were going to make it out of this mess. Okay, so it turns out I had a lot of strong feelings about this. And they were not the same as Joe’s.

What is appropriate?

Is riding that train high on cocaine appropriate lyrics for a 9 year old to sing? Is glorifying drugs that could kill you appropriate? No. But what about the after story wherein Clapton goes through rehab and actually starts a rehab clinic because he understand what it is like to suffer from addiction.

What about Aerosmith’s lead singer, Steven Tyler, a recovered addict, making regular appearances at rehab clinics and performing impromptu sessions to provide inspiration.

What about falling down and getting back up again? What about the bigger picture? Isn’t the story around the lyrics more important?

What about the fact Steven Tyler wrote that song to because he was appalled at how stories about child molestation are never front and center? What about the fact that he wrote it raise awareness, to effect change, to make a difference?

The irony is, I only know these stories because of Joe.

He is one of the biggest advocates I know for freedom of speech, living life unafraid and speaking up for what you believe.

This was about something else.

It was about the wild, insane, ferocious, loving, primal energy of a dad wanting to protect his boys for as long as humanly possible from the twisted, disturbing, nearly unspeakable realities of life.

To be loved like that. Quite something.

I called him. We talked. For a long time. About fear and love. About how knowledge can be power. And too much can be poison. About the power songs have to transform your feelings and the world.

We talked about the importance of intention. About how when Leo eventually performs that song, he will know that although it describes horrible atrocities, it does so with the INTENTION of saying THIS is NOT okay.

So, for Leo, as an extremely compassionate, pro-active, human and animal rights advocate, perhaps this is an incredible learning opportunity.

It certainly was for us.