What is your rock?

What if you let it go?

But what about anything worthwhile takes effort? What about the burden of responsibility? What about hard work pays off and… you find yourself in the struggle.

Herein lies the dilemma.

Do more? Do less? Push harder? Let go?

We are each prone to doing one or the other.

The media encourages us to do more. Mindfulness advocates suggest we do less but more wholeheartedly. Our fitness instructors tell us to push harder. Our yoga instructors promote more of a letting go.

And then there’s the vast middle that favor a good balance– whatever the hell that looks like.

I yo-yo between more, harder and more harder.

This seems to be the unfortunate norm amongst most people I know. And I am not terribly drawn to the people who do less. However, I am incredibly drawn to the passionate people I know who are calmly committed to what they love.

Calm and passionate have always seemed so deeply incompatible to me and it wasn’t until coming across a Howard Thurman that is finally clicked differently for me.

I have read and loved this quote for a long time but like a lock combination it finally clicked into place this last time.

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

My typical response is of course and yes. And I always think I AM doing what makes me come alive. BUT the world doesn’t seem to need it.

Only now do I hear it not as the world needs what I am doing but rather who I am when I am doing it.

The world needs me and everyone else to feel alive.

Being alive is not enough.

Feeling alive. That’s the point. Both the means AND the ends. And THAT is the part that always screws me up. I always think IF I do what makes me come alive THEN the world will need what I have done.

All I have to do is push harder.

Obviously, most of us have goals– a desired end game in mind. And that requires effort. Often, lots of it!

I am certainly not Zen enough to just be with what is. I don’t even think that is a reasonable goal for me to shoot for in this lifetime. In fact, I may be several lifetimes off from that one.

However, I am, right now, making a ginormous mental note to myself about what the world needs.

And it is not the results of my boulder at the top of its hill, which leaves me stressed out, anxious and overwhelmed with failure and lack of a viable plan.

The world may need what I do but more importantly who I am when I’m doing it.

Because that me is full of joy, compassion, curiousity, gratitude, humor, love, warmth, courage, resiliency, hope, truth, energy and other extremely worthwhile stuff.

And that’s who I want to be and be around.