Free At Last

Phew.

So, it turns out I am not insane. I have joked around about it here and there, but when the lights of my ability to make sense go out, I wonder quite seriously if there is something wrong with me.

Turns out it is not me per se but my overactive amygdala and finally I know what I can do to change it.

When does this ever happen?

The problem AND solution in one shot.

Just to back up for a minute, here’s what sometimes happens to me.

In particularly intense, loud or pretentiously affected social situations, I begin to lose my emotional, intellectual bearings and subconsciously black out.

I know where I am. I have my hearing and eyesight but none of the information my brain is collecting makes any sense.

I can’t seem to attach meaning to the words coming out of peoples’ mouths. Nor can I seem to put names with faces. I get panicky, begin sweating and usually excuse myself to go the bathroom until I can pull it together.

This happens rarely now.

And has been much less frequent as I’ve gotten older. Partly because I choose not to put myself in such situations. But also because I have incorporated physical interventions.

When I feel that initial swirl of confusion, I run my fingers through my hair or clasp my hands together­­– some gentle physical gesture that regrounds me as ME in the situation before I get floaty, and exit myself.

This used to happen quite often. Not just in social situations but highly pressured academic situations, triggering family events– any situation involving what I perceived to be toxic levels of fear with no perceived exit.

I have always known about the Amygdala, the primitive part of the brain in charge of flight, fight or freeze responses.

I am a big flyer and freezer.

But I did NOT know how when the amygdala gets activated, it physiologically usurps power from the pre-frontal cortex (PFC) and the hippocampus.

This is kind of a big deal because… the pre-frontal cortex is in charge of emotional balance, bodily regulation and fear modulation, or the ability to put fear into a situational context. Is there real danger?

The PFC is also in charge of executive functioning or making sure all these various components work harmoniously together.

AND it cannot do ANY of this if the amygdala is in full activation mode.

Nor can the hippocampus do ITS job, which it to store and access memory. So, the ability to think back and remember, hmm, this has happened before and it ended up okay so I don’t really need to panic, is GONE.

However, as it turns out, there is a rather simple method for deactivating an activated amygdala.

NAME the emotion.

I know, sounds ridiculous, illogically simple. BUT, it works. I’ve tried it and so apparently have a ton of neuroscience researchers and attachment theorists.

Here’s how it works: separating from the first-hand experience of feeling the feeling just long enough to name it creates exactly the micro-second of neutrality necessary to deactivate the amygdala.

Labeling the emotion creates room.

The room to investigate the reality of what is happening versus our impulsive reaction to it. The room to breathe and gather all the useful tools and resources our brain offers to us.

It opens up a micro-moment to reflect and control how we want to respond.

It is kind of like creating an emotional parenthesis.