Are You the Captain of Your Day?

Or do you get thrown around in the white cap waves of circumstance?

I usually succumb to the topsy-turvy do the best you can approach. And it works. The day begins. I make it through. The day ends and I think, wow, I did it. Another day.

BUT, something kind of mundanely magical happened this week. I took an exercise class the morning after a rather emotionally challenging night, and the instructor asked us, as we were all warming up…

Are you just going to get through this class?

Or are you going to set an intention? Make it your own?

Right up until he said that, I thought getting through seemed like quite a lofty goal. But then I paused and reconsidered, okay, maybe there is higher ground here. Maybe it’s not just about surviving.

Maybe it’s about thriving.

I’ve said this to myself before. But I always roll my eyes (at myself) because thriving seems synonymous with work harder! Push through! Take it the next level.

Just do it! Be ALL that I can be (which I am barely able to do as it is). Like I am somehow Nike or the Army.

Thriving makes me feel like napping.

Ugghh.

But then, one day later, I received a Sobonfu Some CD collection from a dear friend in San Francisco. Towards the beginning she says:

You are not a tourist here.

Begin each day with an intention, a prayer. Bring whatever gifts you have to it.

This resonated with me. A tourist has things to do, boxes to check, an agenda to follow. They are a visitor in a strange land.

But, I often feel that way often in my day to day.

Like I am checking the boxes of what I have to do. Following an agenda. Like an extremely fortunate soldier valiantly, responsibly, dutifully guarding and protecting what I consider myself blessed to have.

I clean the house like I am preparing constantly for the arrival of the queen. I encourage the boys to practice their instruments as if the day will be permanently stamped INCOMPLETE if we don’t.

And, I try to be fun.

Not always because I feel fun. But because I know fun, relaxation and play is important for happiness. As if it’s a formula. Like ‘how to get the most out of Paris’.

But I don’t want to be a tourist in my life.

The idea of setting intentions has always sounded like it should be transformational. But finally, for some reason, this week, after getting this message from two VERY different sources it hit me.

Maybe goals are NOT intentions.

Maybe the idea of beginning the day with an intention is not the equivalent of: Today I will NOT eat ANY chocolate and NOR yell, too loud.

I woke up Tuesday morning and set the intention to fill the day with as much love as I could, everywhere I could. The day became like a scavenger hunt of possibilities for spreading kindness.

This included toward myself.

It was kind of like having a big secret inside that no one else knew about it and no one could take away if they did. It’s the first time since I was pregnant with each of our sons that I felt this enormous joy inside my belly.

I was more patient and fun-loving than I’d been in a while.

But more importantly, I felt kinder, softer, more loving.

How we enter a day matters – the intention we set that elevates the day from something we try to get through to something we embrace and enter with energy and vision.

This morning, the boys and I sounded the singing bowl we received yesterday from Tibet. We closed our eyes and sat still until the vibrations had emanated their last echo, and we each set our intention.

Leo wanted to argue less, to try and find fun in the day.

Even if it wasn’t the sailboat he was hoping to sail or the person he was hoping to sail with. To try and look for the best.

Finn’s intention was to try and listen to what people really wanted. And to notice nature’s feelings..

We each set out with a direction, our heart sails set on a specific course.