Flip Flop Mania

Everybody’s doing the best they can.

Except for the people who aren’t doing a bleepin’ thing.

Or worse, muddying it up for the people who are! Or double worse, slowing it down with ridiculous pointless political red tape that makes THEM feel important because THEY are preserving and protecting “due process” and a tradition of mediocrity.

Oops. Did I just say that?

Aren’t those the same people who are doing the best they can?

Hmm. It’s a bit of a quagmire. This is the internal insanity I bounce between pretty much every day. The majority of people I know, including myself, are truly giving it their best shot. Falling down. Getting up. Trying again. Doing great. Repeat.

BUT, there are people who quite intentionally throw wrenches into plans because … why… they are unhappy in their own lives? They don’t want to be left behind? They feel resentful for a graveyard of grievances they’ve buried throughout their life.

Who am I talking about?

Coaches who think bullying is motivational. Teachers who are more motivated by their union than their passion to be excellent educators. Anyone who thinks publically condescending behavior is acceptable.

Martyrs. Know-it-alls. And of course douche nozzles.

Who else?

Glad you asked. Also, on this list … are people who bitch incessantly about their own problems and turn even good news into yet another impossibly difficult drama.

People more interested in pointing out the myriad of insurmountable problems rather than brainstorming solutions. People committed to calling out who hasn’t done what than moving forward and doing it themselves if need be.

Phew. Okay, that covers it for now.

Obviously, we are all capable of questionable, lame and occasionally despicable behavior. I’m talking about people for whom it is a lifestyle.

BUT, this is life, right? We must learn how to confront ALL different kinds of people and situations. Each is an opportunity to learn how to be more patient, accepting, self-advocating, constructive, persevering. Yada yada yada.

My go-to approach is to start a quiet revolution.

This works great when I have boatloads of energy to give naming, branding and recruiting for my revolution. But I sometimes forget the VAST amount of long-term follow though and administrative drama involved.

Luckily, there is an equally radical but less time and energy consuming solution.

A close friend suggested a few months ago when I was tackling a tough parenting situation that she liked to work the edges of things.

Work the edges of things?

I loved it and got right away what it meant.

I love working in the margins. There is always more room and less people looking over your shoulder.

And sometimes the margins are the perfect place for flip-flopping to find a momentary reprieve of unidimensional freedom.

Margins allow Zen acceptance and fiery righteousness to play creatively.

I have been working in the margins starting a quiet revolution with two awesomely bold, perseveringly scrappy, creatively resourceful women at our son’s elementary school.

Together this year’s PTA president, our Principal and myself have found the time, funds and tribe of passionate teaches and parents to incorporate Mindful Awareness into our school and the lives of all those we touch.

It’s an important accomplishment that I hope effects us in ways I cannot yet imagine.

We need it.

And it feels good to be focused on what and who can help build this fundamental foundation for inner resilience rather than being resigned to the usual onslaught of organized chaos.

My hope is that it breathes compassion, connection and creativity back into our communication that is so often reduced to lol sound bytes.

I’m sure my proclivity for flip-flopping will not suddenly evaporate. I am after all a Gemini. BUT, my hope is to see that innocuously unifying little hyphen more.