Ninja Mom Mode

Combatting the incompetence of intellectual arrogance.

We all have people we know whose smug sense of implicit superiority oozes into conversation. It can’t not because their altruistic desire to educate listeners as to the right way to think about a given topic is too strong.

Politics, religion, educational snobbery– all ripe subjects for this kind of tomfoolery.

Ironically, sometimes it’s the most liberal people I know who mistake their opinion for fact.

Opinions become dangerous when they can’t accommodate other viewpoints.

Singular-minded opinions in the hands of doctors, pediatricians in particular, shift arrogance from bad behavior to incompetent negligence.

Not being open-minded to multiple solutions means you are only effective for the small percent of the population that is served by that one solution.

There is never just one answer. Never.

Luckily, after being offended, insulted, unnerved and self-doubting, I got fierce and kicked into Ninja Mom mode.

Our son Finn is a creative, imaginative, sweet, hilarious, loving, kind boy who can focus for hours on disassembling a stereo project. He can sit for hours creating cartoon superhero characters or self-starring cooking episodes.

He has also been tested borderline ADHD.

But he has trouble reading (because he sees wide – sees the illustrations and subtle details, considers the potential backstories and possible outcomes).

He has difficulty focusing at school (so many distractions) and controlling impulses when he gets excited, upset or feels passionately.

He tests boundaries, which can be challenging, but it is always only about experimenting, exploring, testing his ideas against the reality.

He is an innovator.

Our doctor found his behavior to be abnormal for his age and gave us a psychiatrist recommendation.

The Eastern philosophy acupuncturist we went to see today asked about his diet, his eating habits, his sleep, his early childhood experiences. She talked to him. She checked his tongue – found white stuff. She asked about dairy.

At least 50% of Finn’s diet is dairy. He drinks close to half a gallon of milk daily and I always thought great, because he doesn’t eat a lot and it has protein. He loves cheese and ice cream and yogurt. She found the same issues with me.

We are now drinkers of almond and coconut beverages. Yikes!

We are totally terrified of finding decent ice cream substitutes but we are committed for three weeks. We are open to trying to different things.

We explained about his multiple ear infections, tubes in his eyes, sleep apnea issues early on and adenoid and tonsil surgery. She suggested that his nervous system is probably a bit over-stimulated. She did acupuncture, which he loved.

We will keep at it and see. Maybe it will help. Maybe not.

We are not opposed to psychiatrists, medication or anything that assists him. We are opposed to snap judgments and lecturing tactics.

It seems kind of rudimentary to see if working with his diet and the physical chakras of his nervous system works first. We are also incorporating a daily mindful awareness practice, that we HAVE TO actually start!

The one plan we are sticking with…

Ask questions, listen and respond. Repeat as necessary.